Only the good die young

Dear darling,

She was in the same spot as me. We worked the same hours at the same store while we waited for the missionaries who left at the same time. We were even planning weddings for the same week. Then we both got the same news: that we weren't healthy enough to go on those missions we both wanted. The only difference was that she wasn't healthy enough to keep going.

Now I've moved on from that place and I'm planning a wedding and she's moved on and her family is planning a funeral.

It doesn't seem fair. Why her? Why when we thought we had stories that were so much the same, is her ending so tragic?

Why do the good die young? It always seemed like a line in a song that was too popular for it to be normal but I get it now. The good die and it isn't fair. And now I'm asking the same question hoping someone has an answer to make this make sense because she is dead and I'm still here and you are there and I just want you to hug me and tell me it will be okay.

I want you to explain to me why she had to go. And I don't want 'it was the lords plan' and I don't want 'she is in a better place'. I know that, and if I didn't now isn't the time I'm learning it. I want you to explain why someone that good, that full of life and love, can just be gone.

I want you to explain why her mother is going to live the rest of her life with a part of her soul missing.

I want you to explain why her sisters are going to grow up and get married and not be able to have her there.

I want you to explain why her brother is going to have to find someone else to help him do his math homework.

I want you to explain why I am going to have to keep living life like everything is normal when we were in the same place, not even six months ago. Explain why I get to plan my wedding and her family has to plan her funeral.